Insanity

This was written at a park in Indiana. We lived there my Senior year of high school. I used to go down by the river and meditate. I had begun to have feelings for another boy in school and I was torn apart inside. Hence:

Insanity

It seems to me

after all this time,

I'd know what to do,

I'd have peace of mind.

Yet day after day

I'm more confused,

Seems there's a power

that won't let loose.

This power within

I can't explain,

I know that slowly

I'm going insane.

I know I'm unworthy

of the love you give,

And I find myself

not wanting to live.

Then I think of how

I'd be hurting you,

If I took away our love

that tenderly grew.

Crystal Murphy

April 1973